Spicy Beer Cheese.

My best suggestion for this recipe is too make sure you have all your ingredients prepared to add, since this goes rather quickly and needs constant stirring.

1 Tbs olive oil
2 Tbs butter
3 Tbs flour
1/2 cup half and half
1 cup beer
1 tsp dry mustard
1 diced jalapeno (or 2, if you're me and love spice)
2 cups shredded sharp cheddar

Sautee diced jalapeno in oil. Set aside.

Melt butter on medium heat, and add flour, whisking constantly until a thick paste is created. Tips for making a roux can be found here.  I've only ever made a roux to the white/maybe blonde stage, and this is no different.

Add half and half, beer, mustard, and jalapeno, whisking constantly until blended. Let sit and simmer for a few minutes until the sauce starts to thicken and bubble a little.

Add cheese in small handfuls, whisking until completely blended.

Serve immediately with chips, pretzels, bread, etc. or store for later reheating. Effing delicious.

You can use milk instead of half and half for health reasons, but you are already eating beer cheese, so I figure you might as well go for it.

I made healthy soup for once!

Following vegetables can be fresh, canned, or frozen. Measurements are approximate, easily substituted for any 16 oz freezer bag of mixed veggies:

1/2 cup corn
1/2 cup sliced green beans
1/2 cup sliced carrots
1/2 cup peas

2 sliced celery stalks
1 large or 2 small peeled, cubed potato
1 small, diced white onion
1 can diced tomatoes
3 cups of tomato juice or cocktail
2 cup of veggie or chicken stock
1 Tbs soy sauce
1 tsp thyme
1 tsp oregano
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp house seasoning*
1 bay leaf

Optional: 1.5 lb of browned and drained hamburger.

All items in the slow cooker on high for four hours OR brought to a boil on the stove and simmered for half an hour. This soup is even better the next day when all the flavors settle together. By using veggie stock and skipping the hamburger or replacing it with a veggie substitute, this dish is vegan!

I recommend using low sodium everything for the prepackaged foods. This is a dish that can get very salty, very quickly. If you use regular sodium items, however, skip the house seasoning and add 1/2 tsp of pepper and 1 full tsp of garlic powder

*2 parts salt
1 part black pepper
1 part garlic powder

Beef Dumpling Soup

2-3 lb Chuck Roast
2 sliced celery stalks
1 cup of sliced carrots
1 diced white onion
1 can of cream of mushroom soup
1 can of cream of celery soup
1 can of golden mushroom soup
1-2 bay leaves
1 tsp ground thyme leaves
1 tsp parsley
1 tsp oregano
beef broth
House seasoning*
16 oz can of buttermilk Grands biscuits.


Season the roast with house seasoning and sear on all sides. Place it with everything else in the crock pot and coat until covered with beef broth. Cook for 8-10 hours on low, or 4-6 on high. Shred the roast an hour or so before serving.

If adding dumplings or noodles:
When your roast has an hour or so left to cook, shred the roast and prepare the dumplings. Flatten biscuits into disks and roll them into tubes. Cut or tear into half inch pieces. Salt and pepper them, drop them on top. Add a little more broth. Season everything with oregano. Cook for another hour.



*2 parts salt
1 part black pepper
1 part garlic powder

Fcuk KFC, eat this.

I have clearly moved on from the slow cooker, for the time being. Serial monogamist that I am, I have clung to chicken, and I refuse to cheat. Eventually, I will move on.

I love (and still love) KFC, Culver's and Hardee's (if they still do that?) BUCKETS OF CHICKEN. My favorite part? The drumsticks. If you had asked me what my favorite food was when I like, 4, it would have been a toss up between steak, tacos, and "chicken leg skin." I added chicken dumpling soup to that list a few years later, and nothing has changed. NOTHING*, if this blog wasn't ample evidence enough.

I decided to skip out on all that pesky, healthy white meat parts, and wanted to find a cheap way to just have the best at home. I don't have to put pants on, pick something up from a drive-through, talk to anyone on the phone, but after one initial grocery shopping, I don't even have to leave my house this way!

This is essentially the same prep as the Buffalo wings, I'll admit, just recipe adjusted for drumsticks and made with a flavor palette intended to go with mashed potatoes and classic chicken gravy. One could have mashed potatoes and gravy with their wings as well, but this is all savory, no tangy and/or spicy; traditional flavor. You could easily just read the recipe and use your comprehensive skills and common sense to remember how to bake these, but I'll hash it all out regardless. You could also use this recipe for any cut of chicken, adjusting accordingly.




You will need:
6 drumsticks
1/2 cup or so of flower
1 tsp paprika
1 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp onion powder
1/2 cup of butter
salt and pepper

First, boil to drumsticks in very salty water for about 5-10 minutes, or until fat starts to fluff to the top and accumulate.

Remove pieces with tongs and place on paper towels and allow to dry for a bit. Pat dry to remove any excess moisture.

Mix flour and dry ingredients in a resealable bag, drop in the chicken, seal, and shake until coated. Place on a foil lined baking sheet, and cover with plastic wrap. Let harden in the fridge for at least one hour, I would recommend a few.

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.

On the stove or in the microwave, melt butter. Dunk sticks in butter.

You heard me.

Return chicken to baking sheet. Bake for at least 20 minutes, then either temp the chicken (165 for safety) or check for pinkness. Flip and cook for another 10 or more minutes, depending on the desired crispness of the outside. Unlike the wings, I didn't fear over-drying them. The thicker meat will take longer to cook, naturally, and so the outer skin will take longer to crisp. I was more cavalier leaving these in the oven than I did the wings. My first attempt at those came out a little dry, causing my second batch to be more closely guarded for perfection.

These drumsticks were suuuper juicy.

I tried this last night, just as an experiment, and I was very pleased with the results. Potatoes were straight forward, boiled, mashed russets with butter, salt and garlic. Cheater jar of chicken gravy all over everything. Wonderful!

*I lied, pizza is on that list. Part of the allure of pizza is I either just have to put it in an oven or order it, so that's a huge selling point. I'm thinking now I have to try and make pizza...

Better for You Buffalo Wings.

I have had a mad craving for Buffalo style chicken wings for a while now. I think it's because I went out to eat at this wonderful Asian Fusion place in Appleton, Gingerootz and it was fantastic. I ordered the Tangerine Chicken, and while it was totally delicious, it looked like Buffalo bites, but didn't taste like it.

So, I read around on how to make Crispy Baked Buffalo Chicken Wings a few days ago. In an oven! Because I am not allowed to buy a deep fryer, by my own choice as I will proceed to deep fry everything. Now, of course you can still deep fry things on the stove top, but it is messy and annoying and I Just Know I Shouldn't

ANYWHO, information gathering determined the enemy of oven crispiness: moisture. I definitely used the first steps of this recipe and will probably continue to navigate this blog more, simply because I like her writing style. It's funny and self-effacing. Anyone who writes about eating too many wings at a frat party to the point of illness, and still loves wings is Knowing Thyself, for sure. You should most definitely read about her boiling the chicken bits, and her own shock at the thought too.

The wings don't need to be boiling to fully cooked, just enough to render some of the fat out. Parboiling takes out the excess blubber that can make the chicken soggy, in short. It's gross too, it rises to the top all foamy, but it is oddly satisfying to watch it fluff up and toss it away.

I did not stop there on my quest to crisp my wings to crispiest though. While I did boil the wingettes for about 10 minutes or so, I also dredged them in a flour mixture after DRYING THEM. "Moisture is the enemy of crisp!"  Let that flour harden in the fridge for at least on hour, then bake. I left mine in for several hours, as I made these in advance, and some recipes suggested even leaving it in over night. I have not had any problems, but you do you.

Now, the chicken used with this was already separated into drummetes and wingettes, but that recipe above has a lovely video showing you how to cut them quickly if you are working with an entire wing.

Naturally, this is a combination of things I LIKE and adjusted for, but it was made by searching around the web. I like spice and garlic, so maybe you want to turn it down.

I am just going to dive right in at this point, so here goes:

Guacabrole

2 pitted, peeled, and mashed avocados
1 Tbs olive oil
1/4 cup diced red onion
1 diced jalepeno
1/2 tsp cumin
2 Tbs chopped fresh cilantro
1/2 tsp minced garlic
juice of one lime
salt and pepper

Mix it all together, that easy. If you can resist eating it all immediately, chilling in the fridge for an hour beforehand helps all the flavors blend. Guac is so easy to manipulate and customize, this is just my preferred, simple base. Throwing in tomatoes is good too, leave out the jalepeno if you don't like heat, etc. I've been know to just buy pre-made pico de gallo and mix it in with mashed avocado. I eat at least three avocados a week though...I have a problem.

Pressing plastic wrap to the top and trying to get out the air out before storing will save the guac from going brown. A spritz more of lime will help freshen it up too.

Sour Cream and Onion Dip.

So Deric bought a metric fuck tonne of sour cream when I last made stroganaff, even though I only needed 1/3 of cup. As a result, I've been looking for recipes that use sour cream to try and get rid of this before it goes bad.

Now, I was never a huge fan of onions until recently, and I still dislike raw, white or yellow onion. Red has enough of a punch to it that I don't mind it with peppers, but even then, meh. I like the onion flavor more than the texture. Long story short, I've never had such horrible gas in my life, but this was delicious. I am thinking they would be good with the potato wedges I also make, for even more gas!

1 1/2 cups sour cream
1 cup mayonnaise
1 diced small green pepper (1 cup or less)
1 diced white onion (about a 1 1/2 cups)
1/2 tsp WHITE pepper
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1-2 Tbs olive oil
salt and black pepper

In a skillet, saute onions and peppers in oil with a pinch of salt and pepper until onions are nearly clear.

Mix all ingredients together when done. Refrigerate until everything is cooled, stir before serving. Simple, simple.

Garlic and Herb Potato Wedges

Oven Potato Fries/Wedges
4 large baking potatoes, rinsed and scrubbed
4 Tbs Roasted Garlic olive oil OR 4 Tbs olive oil and 1 tps minced garlic
1/2 tsp black pepper
1/2 tsp dried rosemary
1/2 tsp oregano
1/2 tsp thyme
2 Tbs grated Parmesan cheese
1 1/2 tsp salt

Cut your potatoes to desired thickness. If you want to peel them and go with more traditional fries, go ahead, but I personally went with wedges: Cut each potato in half lengthwise. Cut each half, lengthwise, into 4 to 6 equally sized wedges.
Place the potatoes into a mixing bowl with ice water and let them soak for half an hour. This will create a crispiness. If you want softer potatoes, skip this step.

Make you to pat the wedges dry before mixing them with the remaining ingredients.

I just tossed them into a tupperware container and shook them up with all the the dry ingredients first, then added the oil and shook it again. Any method of mixing should be fine, I just found this to coat everything pretty evenly.

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.

On a large cooking sheet coated in tin foil, arrange the wedges evenly.

Bake the potatoes for 30 to 35 minutes or until desired crispiness.

Eat the crap out of them.

Super Simple Slow Cooker Chicken Dumplings

1-2lbs of chicken thighs OR 3 chicken breast halves 
2 sliced celery stalks
1 cup of sliced carrots
1 diced white onion
1 can cream of celery soup
1 can cream of chicken soup
1-2 bay leaves
poultry seasoning
oregano
chicken broth
House seasoning*
16 oz can of buttermilk Grands biscuits. OR 12 oz of dry egg noodles
Parsley

Season chicken with poultry seasoning and House seasoning, line bottom of the slow cooker with chicken, vegetables, bay leaves, and soups. Pour in chicken broth until everything is covered. Cook on high for 4 hours.

Take out chicken and shred, put back in cooker, stir everything.

Flatten biscuits into disks and compress them, tear into quarters. Salt and pepper them, drop them on top. Add a little more broth. Season everything with oregano. Cook for another hour.
OR if using noodles, add noodles and significantly more broth, as the noodles will expand more than the dumplings will. Cook on low or buffet for another half or so. The noodles will soften faster than the dumplings, but can sit in pot without over cooking.

Sprinkle with parsley and serve.

You can always add more broth whether you are going the dumpling or noodle route if you think you need it. It's pretty impossible to have too much or too little, so make it to you liking.

I have made this without the poultry seasoning too, and it was still tastey. Also, your chicken can be frozen or thawed. In fact, I would recommend it frozen, as it seems to stay juicier. Not that succulence is an issue with this recipe, trust me!

*2 parts salt
1 part black pepper
1 part garlic powder

Not actually barbacoa.

Perfect for tacos, burritos, quesadillas, whatever.

3 lb chuck roast
1 tsp cumin
1 tsp chili powder
1 (or 2 if you like it hotter) sliced jalapeño pepper
1-2 bay leaf
1 tsp minced garlic
1 Tbs oregano
1 sliced small/medium red onion
1 tsp (or 2 again) Chipotle Tabasco sauce
1 tsp lime juice
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
2 cups chicken stock or broth
salt and pepper and garlic powder*

You can literally just put all of this in your slow cooker and ignore it 8 to 10 hours until it falls apart.

But I have some suggestions:

Trim any excessive fat from the roast (but not all.) Season with salt, pepper, and garlic, on both sides. Brown the edges on high heat on the stove. Great searing tips here.

Caramelize the onions peppers in an oiled pan on medium heat with salt and pepper as well to bring out flavors. If you splash some broth on pan to deglaze it, you can get all the yummy char bits into the slow cooker as well.
You can also substitute just about any meat for this. It's equally wonderful with chicken.

Cook this with boneless skinless chicken thighs, and you can add splash of V8, a dollop of sour cream, and sprinkle some tortilla chips and shredded cheddar on top and you've yourself a soup too.

Cook on low for about 8 to 10 hours, OR high for 4 to 5. Around the 7 or 3 hour mark, it should easily shred with a fork. I usually tear mine up right in the pot around then and let it cook for another hour or so.

This last round, I covered the roast with extra broth completely and saved the liquid. Makes for a great spicy au jus, gravy base, dip for quesadillas, etc. and since I had so much, I will probably just use it as a low maintenance broth for my next spicy roast or beef soup. Freezes into a great meat jelly for next round! If you have leftover meat from cooking it either way, freeze the meat and broth together saves great.

Update: Reusing the broth was a total success!

*2 parts salt
1 part black pepper
1 part garlic powder

Mix together in a container, easy in a pinch. I stole this from Paula Deen, but doubled up on the garlic and pepper. Whatever.

Stroganaff like food!

1 lb or so of sirloin steak, or whatever you prefer, cut into thin strips
1-2 tbs olive oil
1 can condensed mushroom soup
2 cups of beef stock or broth
1/4 cup red wine
1 cup sliced mushrooms
1 sliced large onion
12 oz uncooked egg noodles 
1/2 cup sour cream
parsley pepper
garlic powder

Season the meat with pepper and garlic. Brown in a skillet over medium heat the olive oil. Remove the meat for now so as not to over cook it.

Saute with onions and mushrooms in the leftover juices from the meat and oil.

Pour the soup, broth, wine, mushrooms, and onion in the skillet and heat to a boil. Stir in the noodles. Reduce the heat to medium and cook until the noodles are tender, stirring often.

Stir the sour cream and beef back into the skillet, and cook until nice and bubbly. Top with parsley

I would not recommend adding salt to this dish until you've tasted it.